The Moment My Soul Becomes an Electron on the Moon
I find myself lost in a space of dark densities, where
The sun wind keeps blowing hard in all directions
Traveling as fast as light with other fellow electrons
I recognize few of them as my former acquaintances
Before swarming into antennas, sensors, end users
We all slough off our clothes made of digital codes
As we fill in every blank with our shapeless bodies
The whole world trespass into a parallel universe
While resurrecting at every switch turned on
—
When Burying Me: to Allen Qing Yuan
First, remove all my clothes and masks
That I have been tired of wearing, skinned off
The tattoos on my chest, my heart, my soul
I have kept as my secrets. Then send me
Into the resomator like an alchemist, with the
Words I have used most often, the images
I have created and collected in my mind
Burn me as the Dao God did the Monkey King
With the purest fire from hell, from heaven
Tongues of blue gas, or red electricity
Sizzling, I will enjoy being kissed first and
Last, by my own words, my own metaphors
—
Father’s Soliloquy: For Yuan Hongqi
The other night, before the cock crowed, or
The crow cocked out of darkness, a yellowish
Shape stalked in vision, as in blank verse
‘Mark me,’ it says, sounding almost exactly
Like my late father. ‘Lend thy very serious
Hearing to what I shall unfold.’ Suddenly alerted
I got up among figures, between dream and sleep
‘When you were a teenager, I hated you so much
For looking at me always with your eye whites
Giving me an ugly face each time I talked to you
So much so that I cursed you numerous times in
My dream for being such an unworthy son; I often
Doubted if you were my own flesh until you grew
Into a normal loving adult, making me feel guilty
All my life; also, I was suspicious of your mom
Betraying me, not only in heart but also in body
I almost caught her making love with some guy
On our own bed – -You still remember that small
Apartment we used to live in? Among all my dadly
Secrets, these two I want to reveal to you first
Next time, I will tell you more about the limbo
Between hell and heaven, with the lightest word
Which might harrow up thy spirit, burn up thy
Blood…’ now the cock crows, and I must vanish
—
You Need Moon
Yes, you do need moon
When darkness engulfs half
Of the world, and makes you pause
For you need a stable universe of time
To reflect on light that guides you
Through the unseen, as through your thoughts
Surely, in this black and heavy stillness
You can see the brilliant colors
Above the entire season, you may even dream
Here you can dissolve into a big whole
Like yin and yang, to nail your souls into
Each other’s flesh, to gain strength
Yes, you simply need moon
For you need this unique reality of our world
To pause, to recover, to discover
—
I Love You, Dear Death
ever since pangu
separating the sky from the earth
all my poor fellow humans
have been hating
hiding from, or
fighting face to face with you
although in vain
but i love you, dear death
not because you are the more fair, and sincere
than any lover willing to declare
nor because you are the ultimate home
to any wandering soul seeking a dome
nor because you could even give one’s name
a guaranteed immortal fame
i do not know how to count
the countless ways i love you
yet i have flirted with your shadow
hundreds of times in private
when i found it unbearable
every cutting pain in my body
when i was simply sick of the fact
life is full of the foul, or
when i lost the meaning and direction
of my dull and humble life
i love you, dear death
because only you can liberate my soul
from the stuffy prisonhouse and give me
the fresh air in the outside world
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